Last night my husband asked me what I thought about the “hot mom controversy.”
I stared at him blankly. And after lording it over me for a few minutes that he knew about something that happened online before I did, he told me about Maria Kang, who put a picture up on her Facebook page showing off her smoking hot body, with her three very young children in front of her and the caption “What’s Your Excuse?”
And as the internet does, it latched on to her and made her insta-famous. She says that the response has been about 80% good and 20% bad, the bad part being jealousy, claims of fat shaming, and even a link to a post by her husband (now removed) in which he supposedly talks about cheating on her. (Make no mistake: no matter what gets the internet’s attention, every single thing you’ve ever put online will instantly become fair game – keep that in mind while you post link bait.)
My goal is not to pile onto this woman. Spend a little time on her site and it becomes obvious that she has issues upon issues relating to food and health, so her body is something she focuses on more than a lot of other people. And her story is inspirational to anyone who has struggled with weight, as she used to. I like a lot of what she has to say, especially about taking time for yourself and your health.
But it’s the way she chose to tell her story. Either she worded her caption that way in order to get attention, or that’s how she really feels about women who don’t look like she does, and I’m not sure which would be worse.
Any single one of us could put up a picture of something we do well and try to shame other people with it. You don’t make your bread from scratch like I do? What’s your excuse?
Ashley packs impressive, healthy lunches for her kids. What’s your excuse?
Jennifer makes incredible food for her kids that is healthy and delicious and filled with love. What’s your excuse?
Ann is a surgeon who works tirelessly to raise money for other’s causes. What’s your excuse?
Ilina works seemingly around the clock to help her community. What’s your excuse?
Sharon lives a fabulously interesting life while managing to be a doting grandmother to half of Rhode Island. What’s your excuse?
Jessica juggles three of the most stylish small kids in the world while always looking absolutely fabulous herself. What’s your excuse?
I could go on and on with that list, because every one of my friends has something extraordinary about them – usually many, many things. And I bet every one of them would jump to tell you what they slack on in order to focus on other things.
It’s the Pinterization of parenthood: our best efforts are put out there for all to see, beautifully photographed, and the rest is swept under the rug.
As I was baking bread yesterday, a giant pile of crap was waiting for me in the guest room. And seeing as it’s been there for a couple of months, chances are it will still be there tomorrow. Fiona couldn’t go to her first robotics practice yesterday because I wasn’t caught up on email and didn’t see the form I had to fill out. Jake had to go to school in sweat pants because all of his jeans were still dirty from a trip we’d just taken. I’m speaking at a conference on Friday and haven’t made my Power Point yet. And all that crap on the counter behind the cooling bread? It gets much worse if you can see the whole kitchen.
But that bread sure looks impressive, doesn’t it? (And it was delicious.)
Embrace what you do well. And by all means show it off (heck, social media runs on envy!). I love looking at pictures of the Star Wars-themed birthday party you created from scratch while I’m making birthday party reservations at the bowling alley (again).
But you don’t necessarily have to put someone else down in order to pump yourself up.
Unless that was your goal all along, because you have a new weight-loss product coming out next month, and you needed the press.
Originally posted on Selfish Mom. All opinions expressed on this website come straight from Amy unless otherwise noted. This post has a Compensation Level of 0. Please visit Amy’s Full Disclosure page for more information.